Can I be completely honest with you? Following God is hard sometimes. It’s hard, and also
confusing. Have you felt this way? Let me tell you my story.
A few years ago, my husband left me. I cried out to God to rescue me, to rescue my marriage,
and to rescue the stable world I’d come to love. The Bible says if you have the faith of mustard
seed you can move mountains. My faith was WAY bigger than a mustard seed. I was completely positive that God was going to heal my marriage. I was convinced that if I had enough faith and belief, it would happen.
The thing is, months passed and God didn’t save my marriage. When my husband finally asked
for a divorce I was devastated. Partially because my husband wanted a divorce, but partially
because my faith had failed me. What had I done wrong? Why hadn’t God come through for
me? Did I not deserve a husband? Was this too hard for God? Was everything I believed in a
If you’ve ever gone through something like this, maybe you know exactly where I’m coming
from. It was during this time I felt God speak to me. It was so intimate and personal, it still
brings tears to my eyes. God said, “I see you, I know you’re in pain, and I love you”. This
omnipotent and omnipresent God that I’d heard about so much about in church and the Bible
suddenly became more than real to me. God saw me. He felt the pain that I felt. And He loved
Something changed inside of me. God doesn’t like to see His children in pain. He doesn’t like it when we suffer. But He promises to be there with us when we do. He also doesn’t promise to
fix everything in our lives. What God does promise to do is give us courage, strength, and a
I honestly can’t tell you why God didn’t save my marriage. What I can tell you is that God wasn’t punishing me, and I didn’t deserve this to happen. Divorce is never God’s intention. The pain we suffer is never God’s intention.
What I can also tell you with absolute certainty is God is a redeemer of everything that is taken
from us. We don’t know why bad things happen (umm…Book of Job anyone?) but stick with
God. Don’t pull away out of anger. Don’t lose hope. Even when things don’t go your way, your
story is not over. God will redeem you. God is the master in creating beauty out of ashes.
So, how did God redeem my story? Well first of all, He encouraged me to share it. Sharing your
story is one of the most powerful thing you can do. I was scared, overwhelmed, and
intimidated to put any part of my personal life on a public platform. But I did it. And purely
through God’s blessing my blog and Instagram reaches thousands. I am thankful for that.
Secondly, you might be curious about my love life, (hehe!). God has blessed me in that area as
well. Without looking for someone new, God placed a wonderful man in my life. A man who
shows me unconditional love when I don’t deserve it. A man who challenges me to be a better
version of myself daily. For that, I am very thankful. (PS: He will not be reading this…we can’t let these compliments go to his head, can we? )
In all seriousness, I hope this post encourages you! Has God created beauty from ashes in your
life? I would love to know your thoughts in the comments below!